Elsewhere: My FFN Penname

I randomly googled the name 'Monica Gilbey-Bieber', my penname, and came across this:

It turns out that Monica Gilbey is a real name, and I'm sorry for that. I owe this woman an apology. Also, did anyone notice that it is in a website about the Parish of St. James? And that my name is James? Creepy...

Hot Problems: Is Bad the New Good?

Curiosity: What Makes Humans Humans

As human beings, our minds have been hard-wired to be curious about the world around us. One of the things we are curious about is how great something can get. With the development of new technology almost everyday, we always wonder how much futuristic and convenient our lives can be just as described in sci-fi books and movies. In today's digital age, electronic gadgets come out of nowhere and outshine other gadgets that just came out yesterday. Technology is becoming as fleeting as the complications of women's fashion.

"Like, iPads are sooooo last season!"

Y! O! U! You wanna!?

On the other end of the spectrum, however, is our natural curiosity about how bad something can get. In today's declining conditions of the music industry, pop songs are being mass-produced in factories, stuffed with senseless lyrics, then coated with a varnish of auto-tune. Every record sounds the same (you've got to step into my world! just kidding!). But it's true. Almost all of mainstream music sounds the same nowadays, getting downhill with everyday I hear the voices of androids on FM radio.

One Less Lonely Gurl: Chapter 2

Monica's reaction to this will be worth gold.

From down the iridescent

(I love Linkin Park! This is already a dead giveaway that I'm not serious about this fanfic at all, although it is true in a sense that the coral reef emits an iridescent light.)

light of the 'coral reef' I discovered came the ebony darkness,

(Dementia Raven Way. Yes this is a reference to her. That and the fact that she also likes Linkin Park.)

 anf from the darkness came a bright, flashing light from the neon sign

(which unfortunately didn't electrocute her. SPOILER WARNING: but when just dreaming, fuck logic.)

that led me to the inner depths ot the 'coral reef'. This is a most fascinating discovery that I have looked at through my cerulean orbs surrounded with abundadnt lashes.

(Cerulean orbs with abundadnt lashes. I resisted the urge to just say it as 'blue eyes with long eyelashes'  to convey the same message because describing her appearance in cheesy purple prose is part of the challenge. A little piece of advice: when it comes to poetically describing eyes, leave that to songwriting and poetry. Examples: 'hazel green tint eyes' as in Warmness on the Soul and 'crystal blue disguise' as in Save Me, both songs by Avenged Sevenfold.)

One Less Lonely Gurl: Chapter 1

That explains a lot.

[AN: I donut own this spongebob thiny. dis is just a fanfic OK!]

When I wrote the first sentence of this fanfic, the author's note, I took into mind to write in text speak when I usually don't. That is part of the challenge.

It wuz

(Jimy wuz here!)

jazz

(bring on the saxophones!)

an ordnary day when I dove deep into the dark azure hue

Yes, this guy plays jazz guitar too.

(Bring on the purple prose! At this point, I already dropped a small hint about my troll-ness when I used 'into' correctly. FYI, in is used for stationary position and into is for motion. Come to think about it, this part of the sentence after 'ordnary' is surprisingly gramatically correct...)

of hte ocean.

(...or maybe not. The typo here is actually intentional. Remember, I am posting the unedited version of this. I've done my best to not correct any errors here when I usually am a Grammar Nazi.)

Welcome to my Blog

Off with you!

So, hey guys, this is Monica Gilbey-Bieber, signing off. Now, welcome to my blog and thanks for being here. I will post the trollfic I wrote, One Less Lonely Gurl, soon for your reading pleasure. It will even come with my commentary for extra lulz. Well, that's all for now. Until then, enjoy flaming my trollfic, reviewing my new fanfic, Plankton's Eye View, or go do something else.