One Less Lonely Gurl: Chapter 6

Great. Now I want one.

I woke up in the middle of the night after such a horrible nightmare and I panted heavily, as if I had just finished a marathon.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?" Bob said as he rushed up to the room to give me some hot cocoa.

(Wait a minute... how did Bob hear her pant heavily if he was downstairs? Oh well, fuck logic.)

"Oh, nothing," I replied. "I just had a horrible, horrible dream... something about my past."

"Just drink this, because in a few hour's time, I have to get to work at the Krusty Krab. If you want, I can take you there and you can try the most delicious food of all the world: the legendary Krabby Patty,

(I was tempted to replace 'Krabby Patty' with 'burger', but I decided not to push through with it. This fanfic would be much worse if I actually did so.)

which I make.

(At least this was kept in canon.)

One Less Lonely Gurl: Chapter 2

Monica's reaction to this will be worth gold.

From down the iridescent

(I love Linkin Park! This is already a dead giveaway that I'm not serious about this fanfic at all, although it is true in a sense that the coral reef emits an iridescent light.)

light of the 'coral reef' I discovered came the ebony darkness,

(Dementia Raven Way. Yes this is a reference to her. That and the fact that she also likes Linkin Park.)

 anf from the darkness came a bright, flashing light from the neon sign

(which unfortunately didn't electrocute her. SPOILER WARNING: but when just dreaming, fuck logic.)

that led me to the inner depths ot the 'coral reef'. This is a most fascinating discovery that I have looked at through my cerulean orbs surrounded with abundadnt lashes.

(Cerulean orbs with abundadnt lashes. I resisted the urge to just say it as 'blue eyes with long eyelashes'  to convey the same message because describing her appearance in cheesy purple prose is part of the challenge. A little piece of advice: when it comes to poetically describing eyes, leave that to songwriting and poetry. Examples: 'hazel green tint eyes' as in Warmness on the Soul and 'crystal blue disguise' as in Save Me, both songs by Avenged Sevenfold.)

One Less Lonely Gurl: Chapter 1

That explains a lot.

[AN: I donut own this spongebob thiny. dis is just a fanfic OK!]

When I wrote the first sentence of this fanfic, the author's note, I took into mind to write in text speak when I usually don't. That is part of the challenge.

It wuz

(Jimy wuz here!)

jazz

(bring on the saxophones!)

an ordnary day when I dove deep into the dark azure hue

Yes, this guy plays jazz guitar too.

(Bring on the purple prose! At this point, I already dropped a small hint about my troll-ness when I used 'into' correctly. FYI, in is used for stationary position and into is for motion. Come to think about it, this part of the sentence after 'ordnary' is surprisingly gramatically correct...)

of hte ocean.

(...or maybe not. The typo here is actually intentional. Remember, I am posting the unedited version of this. I've done my best to not correct any errors here when I usually am a Grammar Nazi.)